Joke of the Week

Off-topic discussions, musings and chat
volvojack
PostsCOLON 1026
JoinedCOLON Tue 26 Jan, 2016 11:57 am

Re: Joke of the Week

Postby volvojack » Mon 04 Jun, 2018 10:23 am

I met an old pal of mine and he told me he was now an extremely successful Lion Tamer at Chipperfields. He said he used to be a School Teacher until he lost his nerve.

The Wife had a "Near Death" experience a couple of nights ago. She turned the T.V. over to Eastenders while i was watching live Football on there.

A Contauner ship from China carrying a Cargo of Yo -Yos has sunk in the Pacific Ocean. So far it has resurfaced 63 times
volvojack
PostsCOLON 1026
JoinedCOLON Tue 26 Jan, 2016 11:57 am

Re: Joke of the Week

Postby volvojack » Wed 06 Jun, 2018 10:03 pm

Having a drink with my pal Paddy and i said did you know that Chrismas Day this year is on a Friday. Pat replied "Oh just hope it doesn't fall on the 13th"

He was telling me that he was worried about his Goldfish having Epilepsy. When i said i had never heard of that he said " Look" and he lifted it by its tail out of the bowl.
volvojack
PostsCOLON 1026
JoinedCOLON Tue 26 Jan, 2016 11:57 am

Re: Joke of the Week

Postby volvojack » Thu 21 Jun, 2018 7:39 pm

Went to bed last night and instead of swallowing a bottle of Viagra i took a of Tippex, woke up this morning with a Huge Correction.
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Some Women are never Satisfied.... my Wife said "Do you realise that we have been Married now for 30 years, I think you should go to one of those Sex shops and get a Penis Enlarger, don't worry how much yoy spend" But she still went potty when i came home with this 18 year old Romanion Lass.
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Why is it ever time you have just a little too much too drink......Someone is sick down your shirt front, wee's in the Wardrobe and leaves something nasty on the Bedroom Carpet.

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